Yes, You Can Grieve a Job Loss. Here’s Why It’s More Common Than You Might Think
Key takeaways:
It’s normal to experience grief after losing your job.
Grief can cause feelings like sadness, anger, or frustration. It can also cause physical symptoms, too, including headaches, upset stomach, and fatigue.
It can take time to recover from losing a job. Many people find it’s helpful to seek support from loved ones and to focus on actions that you can control.
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Grief is a response to a loss. This can include the death of a loved one, the ending of a significant relationship, or even the loss of a job.
If you’re grieving the loss of a job, you’re not alone. It’s totally normal to go through a grieving process after a job ends. After all, getting fired or let go from a job is one of the most difficult life events you can experience.
Let’s take a closer look at how losing a job can affect you — and what you can do to cope.
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Is it possible to grieve after losing your job?
Absolutely. Grief is the pain and heartbreak that follows a loss.
A lot of times, grief is linked to death, especially the death of a close friend, family member, or pet. But the truth is: You can grieve for any type of loss or ending — including job loss.
What are the signs you’re grieving a job loss?
Grief can have many different physical and emotional symptoms. If you’re grieving after leaving a job, it’s possible that you could experience some — or all — of these symptoms. These include:
Disbelief
Anger
Frustration
Sadness
Hopelessness
Guilt
Feeling “numb”
Trouble sleeping
Stomach aches
Headaches
Weakness and fatigue
Most of the time, these symptoms will get better as time passes. Many people recover from grief within a year, but the timeline is different for everyone.
Can you still grieve if leaving was your choice?
Yes. Even if it was your decision to leave your job, you can still experience grief. Maybe you’ve decided to quit or retire. Or maybe you’ve left your job for health reasons, or to take care of a family member.
No matter what the reason, choosing to leave your job voluntarily can bring up mixed emotions. You may encounter feelings such as:
Sadness about saying goodbye
Nostalgia for the good times that you had at your job
Worry about whether you're making the right decision
Fear that you will be forgotten
Worry that you’ll “miss out” on the action after you’re gone
Guilt about how the change will affect others
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Many people leave their current jobs for better opportunities or for retirement. It’s quite possible to feel both excited about the future and emotional about ending your time at your current job. These feelings are very common. Give yourself time to grieve as you embark on your new adventure.
Why does losing a job hurt so much?
There is no doubt that losing a job is hard. These are many reasons why losing a job can hurt. Every situation is different. If your job played other functions in your life, then getting let go can hurt for other reasons as well.
Loss of financial resources
One of the most obvious reasons is that losing a job often has financial implications. If you depend on your paycheck to make ends meet, then losing a job can be very stressful.
Losing purpose
For many people, though, a job is more than just a way to earn money and support your family. In addition to a paycheck, work provides a sense of meaning and purpose. If you’re someone who finds a lot of meaning in your work, getting let go can leave you feeling purposeless and confused.
Loss of identity or self-respect
Losing a job can be particularly painful if your job is the main source of your identity. If you’ve sacrificed relationships, hobbies, and other parts of your life for your job, then you may view your job as your life — rather than just one part of it. In this case, losing your job may affect your self-respect and how you view yourself.
Losing social connection
Work is also a source of social connection for a lot of people. Full-time workers often spend more time with their colleagues than they do with their own families. Some companies may even feel like a second family. Losing a job may mean saying goodbye to important friendships, which can be painful.
Loss of structure
A job can provide a lot of structure in your life. It helps you plan when to wake up. You spend certain hours working, and you learn how to plan around those working hours. When you lose your job, you may also lose this structure. And when you’re not working, it can be difficult to maintain structure on your own, which may make you feel lost.
How does losing a job affect your mental health?
Grief can have many emotional symptoms. But losing a job can affect your mental health in other ways too. Studies have found that job loss is linked to:
Though most people will fully recover from grief, a small number of people can also develop a condition called job-loss-related complicated grief (JLCG). Though JLCG is not an “official” mental health condition, many experts believe that it’s a good way to describe people who have serious, ongoing symptoms of grief after losing their job.
Symptoms of JLCG include:
Difficulty accepting the loss
Yearning for the job
Not knowing who you are anymore
Feeling like you have no purpose in life
Significant anger
Inability to move forward
Replaying memories of your job over and over in your mind
If you or someone you know is showing signs of anxiety, depression, or complicated grief, professional treatment can help. Therapy can provide a safe space to process the loss and move forward (more on how to find a therapist below).
How do you cope with losing a job?
It’s important to remember that it takes time to get through the grieving process. It can also be helpful to seek support and engage in problem-focused coping strategies.
Here are some ideas to help you cope with losing your job.
Give yourself time
It’s absolutely normal to experience a range of feelings after losing a job. These feelings can change from day to day or moment to moment. It’s important to give yourself time to process these feelings before making any big decisions.
You may also want to take some time to think about your next steps. Consider giving yourself a period of time to grieve the loss of your job and to figure out how you’d like to move forward. The specific period of time will depend on your financial situation and how quickly you need to take action.
Focus on what you can control
When the initial shock has worn off, it can be helpful to focus on what parts of your life and career you can still control. This is sometimes called problem-focused coping.
Problem-focused coping is when you confront your problems by taking action wherever you can. In other words, you focus on what you can control. For some people, this can be associated with lower stress, higher self-esteem, and a faster return to the workforce.
Examples of practice problem-focused include:
Focusing on learning new skills that can help you get a new job
Updating your resume
Starting to search for new jobs
Talking to other people in your field
Moving to a new city with more job opportunities
Seek support
Losing a job can cause feelings of shame and embarrassment, which may make you want to isolate yourself from other people. Unfortunately, this can cause loneliness, which can sometimes make you feel even worse.
That’s why it’s a good idea to reach out to others, if you can. It can help to talk about what you're going through to trusted family and friends. If your support system is limited or doesn’t feel like a safe space, you can also consider speaking with a therapist or attending a support group.
Keep up with a daily routine
Self-care is key while you’re dealing with grief. This includes taking care of yourself by going to bed at a regular time, maintaining your personal hygiene, and exercising. Maintaining these habits will help keep you motivated, and it can even help you transition into a new job when the time is right.
Apply for unemployment
Depending on your personal circumstances, you may be eligible for unemployment benefits. Unemployment benefits can help you cope with the financial stress of losing a job — and give you some breathing room to process your grief.
To see if you’re eligible and learn how to apply in your state, visit USA.gov.
Know your health insurance options
Taking care of your health is also important while you’re going through the grieving process. But if you’ve lost your job, you may be worried about losing your health insurance.
Talk to your human resources department to know your options. Depending on factors like your age, income, and previous employer, you may be eligible for COBRA, Medicare, Medicaid, or a plan through the Affordable Care Act (ACA) marketplace.
When to talk to a professional
Sometimes, it can be helpful to talk to a mental health professional while you’re grieving. But some signs it’s time to seriously consider talking to a professional include:
Difficulty taking action to find a new job, if that’s your plan
Struggling with creating enough structure for the transition
Prolonged uncertainty about how to transition to the next phase of your life or work life
You can look for a therapist, grief counselor, or psychiatrist. They can help you understand your symptoms, process your grief, and suggest additional treatments if needed.
To find a mental health professional, you can:
Ask your primary care doctor for a referral
Contact your health insurance company for a list of covered providers
The bottom line
Whether you’ve been let go from a job or decide to leave on your own, you may experience grief over the loss. Common emotional reactions include sadness, anger, and worry. You may even experience a mix of negative and positive emotions, like excitement and relief. Physical symptoms can show up too.
If you’re grieving, it can be helpful to take time to process these feelings. Many people also benefit from focusing on what you can control and reaching out to other people for support. And if your symptoms don’t improve, or you’re feeling worse as time goes on, you can always consider speaking with a mental health professional for additional guidance.
Why trust our experts?
References
American Psychological Association. (2018). Grief.
American Psychological Association. (2023). Problem-focused coping.
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. (2023). Grief.
Dik, B. J., et al. (2013). Purpose and meaning in the workplace. American Psychological Association.
Lawson, K. (2018). Why you should take time to mourn during career transitions. The New York Times.
Morin, R. (2010). Lost income, lost friends – and loss of self-respect. Pew Research Center.
Mughal, S., et al. (2023). Grief reaction and prolonged grief disorder. StatPearls.
Mukku, S. S. R., et al. (2018). Psychological morbidity after job retirement: A review. Asian Journal of Psychiatry.
Papa, A. (2015). Identity continuity and loss after death, divorce, and job loss. Self and Identity.
Pappas, S. (2020). The toll of job loss. American Psychological Association.
Solove, E., et al. (2014). Coping with job loss and reemployment: A two-wave study. Journal of Business and Psychology.
USA.gov. (2023). Unemployment benefits.
van Eersel, J. H. W., et al. (2021). Grief reactions, depression, and anxiety following job loss: Patterns and correlates. European Journal of Psychotraumatology.
van Eersel, J. H. W., et al. (2022). Job loss-related complicated grief symptoms: A cognitive-behavioral framework. Frontiers in Psychiatry.
York, J. (2021). Why does quitting your job still feel so hard? BBC.
For additional resources or to connect with mental health services in your area, call SAMHSA’s National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357. For immediate assistance, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988, or text HOME to 741-741 to reach the Crisis Text Line.
