How My Mother’s Blood Clot Reshaped My World
Key takeaways:
On Friday, Oct. 4, 2019, my mom was diagnosed with blood clots in her leg and lungs.
Her blood oxygen level had plummeted to 60%, and the doctor told her she was actively dying.
The experience was terrifying, and our family still feels traumatized by it.
My Journey is a series of personal essays about what it’s like to cope with a medical condition.
I had been looking forward to Friday, Oct. 4, 2019, for weeks. I was living in Washington, D.C., at the time, and the big local library was having its annual used book sale. I couldn’t wait to go and buy bags of new books.
After I got there, I called my mom, who lives in Pennsylvania, to ask her if she wanted me to get her a few books I had found. An emergency medical technician (EMT) answered the phone. “We’re taking your mom to the hospital,” he said. “She’s sick and can’t breathe.” Then the line went silent. My heart plummeted as the books I was holding dropped to the ground. I raced outside to my car, fueled by sheer panic.
An emergency that had been silently brewing
I didn’t realize it at the time, but my mom, Judy — who was 61 at the time — had been feeling unwell for a while. A week prior, she and my dad had visited me in D.C., and she spent much of the weekend driving. (While there's no way of knowing whether it contributed to my mom's blood clots, anyone traveling for more than 4 hours is at risk of a blood clot. However, the overwhelming majority of people who travel never suffer from such a health scare.) Her right calf started to hurt badly, almost like a pulled muscle. It didn’t get better even once she got home from D.C. and spent a few days resting.
My mom had a routine checkup scheduled for Friday, Oct. 4, so she figured she would ask her doctor about the leg pain then. She also noticed that when she breathed in deeply, she felt stabbing pain in her chest. She woke up that Friday morning at 6AM and felt incredibly dizzy and short of breath. She also had severe pain on the right side of her chest. She stumbled to the bathroom, and then decided to stay in bed until 10AM, when it was time to leave to see the doctor.
When my mom got up as planned at 10AM, she was having so much trouble breathing that she collapsed on the floor. She called my dad, who was at work, and told him she was calling an ambulance. Then she dialed 911 and told them she thought she had a blood clot.
My mom has always enjoyed reading health blogs. So she knew the symptoms for deep vein thrombosis — blood clots in the legs — and pulmonary embolisms, or blood clots in the lungs.
Twelve minutes after my mom called 911, two EMTs arrived. They put her on a stretcher, loaded her into the ambulance and immediately started her on oxygen. It turned out that her blood oxygen percentage level was in the 60s, which meant there wasn’t enough oxygen reaching her organs. An oxygen level of 95% to 100% is normal for most healthy adults.
Around the time that my mom reached the hospital, I had made it back to my D.C. apartment and asked a friend to drive me to Pennsylvania. I knew I was too frantic to drive myself. As soon as we hit the road, I called my dad, who had rushed to the hospital to try to find my mom. Neither of us knew what was going on. I was hysterical, imagining the worst. Dark, morbid scenarios played over and over again in my head. I couldn’t speak.
Meanwhile, the doctors at the hospital immediately sent my mom for a chest scan and ultrasound of her legs. Shortly after, a doctor told her that she had blood clots in her right leg. She also had a bilateral pulmonary embolism — her lungs were blocked by blood clots. The healthcare team started her on a clot-busting drug via IV and moved her to the intensive care unit.
My mom told the doctor she felt like she was dying. “That’s because you were,” he responded. He then told her that she had done a good job getting to the hospital on time. Otherwise, he said, she wouldn’t have survived.
The kind of trauma you never forget
When I arrived at the hospital about 3 hours later, my mom was weak and pale. She could only whisper. I had never been more relieved or happy to see her. She ended up staying in the hospital for 4 days, and I didn’t leave her side once. I camped out on a bench in the room 24 hours a day. I was so shaken up over nearly losing her that I couldn’t eat or sleep. All I could think about was how close she had come to dying.
The CDC says sudden death is the first symptom in about 25% of people who have a pulmonary embolism. I couldn’t stop Googling and reading anecdotes online from people who had lost their loved ones to a blood clot.
That was 4 years ago, and my mom still takes the blood thinner Xarelto (rivaroxaban) every day. The medication helps prevent clotting, which gives both of us peace of mind. She’s doing well and hasn’t had any additional clots.
But the experience changed our family forever. When I returned to work in D.C. and told people what had happened, I dissolved into tears. I couldn’t stand to be so far away from her and struggled to readjust to everyday life.
That’s why, a year later, I moved back to Pennsylvania. I realized the importance of spending as much time as we possibly can together. My mom is my best friend and closest confidante, and I don’t know how I’d get by without her. I constantly relive the terror I felt when I didn’t know what was wrong with her or if she would be OK. I’m eternally grateful that our story has a happy ending, but we all still feel traumatized by the experience.
I also feel strongly about educating others about blood clots. If my mom hadn’t known the symptoms, she might not have realized she was experiencing a time-sensitive emergency. That was especially important because she had numerous risk factors for blood clots: She’s overweight and had conditions including high blood pressure and Type 2 diabetes.
I’ve since met many people who lost family members to blood clots. I’m constantly shocked by how common they are. (About 900,000 people in the U.S. get blood clots every year, according to the CDC.)
It’s essential for everyone to know the symptoms, such as swelling of the leg, shortness of breath, chest pain, and a cough.
And treasure every day you get to spend with your loved ones. That’s exactly what I’m doing with my mom.
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