Do You Hate Showering? Turns Out, You’re Not Alone
Key takeaways:
People avoid showering for a variety of different reasons. This could be because showers worsen a specific health condition. Or simply because it’s hard to find the time.
Mental health conditions like depression can lower someone’s motivation to shower. Others like OCD or trauma can make it a distressing experience.
There are ways to change your showering routine to make it more pleasant, safer for underlying health conditions, or a better fit for your weekly routine.
Table of contents
Showering: It’s a necessary part of everyone’s hygiene routine. But sometimes, it’s the last thing you want to do. You might feel like you’re different from others if you don’t want to shower. Or maybe someone has even made you feel embarrassed about it. But you’re not alone. For many people, showering can feel like an unwelcome nuisance — or even an impossible task — instead of a relaxing self-care experience.
Below, we go through some reasons why you might avoid or hate showering. And tips to help if it’s getting in the way of caring for yourself.
1. Sensory issues
Showers can feel like a sensory overload. Sensory overload happens when your nervous system feels overwhelmed with information and sensations from your external environment.
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This can be a familiar feeling for people who identify with being neurodivergent. But showers can be an unwelcome sensory experience for anyone. When you’re already feeling overstimulated, showers can feel like an extra layer of sensory information your body has to process. This can feel draining.
2. Depression
Many people who live with depression or other mood conditions don’t enjoy showers. The term for this is hygiene indifference. It’s when any routine task related to hygiene or self-care is deprioritized. Other examples include:
Teeth brushing
Hair brushing
Changing clothes
Doing laundry
This can last for weeks to months for those with major depressive disorder.
If you are experiencing any shame associated with hygiene challenges, we want to take a moment to remind you that it is a normal and common symptom of depression. Depression often makes small tasks feel much harder than they used to be. If you don’t have a mental health professional supporting you, consider finding a therapist who is right for you.
3. Obsessive compulsive tendencies
People with obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) may experience impulses to perform a specific ritual or repetitive behavior in the shower. And these behaviors can be both time-consuming and distressing.
Depression and personal hygiene: Depression can make showering really hard. Here are some tips to help care for yourself when living with depression.
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Hot versus cold showers: Which one is better for you after a workout? Our experts dive into the research.
If you have OCD or compulsive tendencies, this may impact your showering experience in a variety of ways. It can make showers take longer than average if you repeat behaviors like scrubbing or shampooing. It can also be mentally exhausting to experience obsessive thoughts about cleanliness and sanitation. Or OCD may cause you to have a fear of water (more on that later). Any of these things can make it stressful to find the time and mental space for showering.
4. Trauma
Some people may avoid or dread the bathing experience because of past traumatic experiences such as abuse or assault. This can lead to fear or avoidance of showering.
Ablutophobia is the technical term for a fear of showering or bathing. It is often rooted in having a scary, negative, or painful past experience related to bathing. However, a fear of bathing can also develop with no history of trauma.
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5. Aquaphobia
Aquaphobia is a fear of water. And one potential trigger can be baths or showers. This fear can be a symptom of OCD. But there can be many other reasons people experience aquaphobia:
A past traumatic event related to water, as mentioned above
Recollection of negative stories or images relating to water
Fear of contaminated water
Fear of drowning
Higher than normal levels of stress
6. Chronic pain
Chronic pain is technically defined as consistent pain for 3 months or longer. And it can have a lasting impact on how you shower and perform activities of daily living.
Someone’s specific source of pain will impact how showering feels. But all types of pain can make things like showering more difficult. For example:
Neuropathic pain may be worsened by heat from warm water or from external stimulation of the skin.
Joint pain might make it hard to get into or stand in the shower.
Chronic healing wounds may be sensitive to heat or water pressure.
Certain devices and techniques can help if a shower worsens your chronic pain. These include shower chairs or shower heads with adjustable pressure.
7. Skin conditions
Some skin conditions that are associated with irritation — like eczema — may be worsened by hot water, which can dry out the skin.
These conditions require different types of skin care and treatment. But in general, here are some tips that may help:
Avoid long showers
Use warm (rather than hot) water
Opt for gentle, fragrance-free body washes
Avoid excessive scrubbing or exfoliation of the skin
Use a fragrance-free moisturizer when you get out of the shower
8. Hard water
If you have hard water in your home, you may like showering less. The difference between hard and soft water is how much calcium and magnesium (minerals) it contains. And as the name implies, people often describe hard water as feeling harsher. Hard water can make soaps and shampoos less effective. It can also make your skin drier and more irritated.
9. Busy schedule
Most people these days have busy schedules with a lot of competing responsibilities. Every day can feel like a juggle between long hours at work, parenting, household chores, and social obligations. This can leave little time for any sort of self-care routine.
So it may be that you want to shower, but you don’t have the time for it. Or you don’t have anyone to watch your kids while you do it. Or that you are simply too tired. This can make a shower start to feel like a chore rather than a relaxing routine.
10. Cultural or spiritual norms
If you grew up in a household where showering every day was the norm, you will likely make that your own personal standard. And the other side of the spectrum is true, too. If showering a few times per week was typical when you were younger, you’ll likely follow suit as an adult.
For example, in Brazil, it’s not uncommon to take multiple showers per day. Whereas in the U.S., it’s more common to shower daily or every other day.
For some religions, showering can also be seen as a form of spiritual renewal or energy cleansing. This can affect someone’s showering experience and frequency too.
It’s okay to have a different showering frequency than your neighbor. As long as your showering routine is something you feel comfortable with and it fits the needs of your daily life, then you can do what’s right for you.
Tips for coping with shower avoidance
You don’t need to shower every day. But the longer you go without showering, the more oil and bacteria can build up on our body. You may experience body odor that is unpleasant to you. And as your scalp gradually releases oil, you may notice your hair becoming oily and difficult to manage.
If you start to be bothered by these changes but still hate showering, the following tips may make it easier:
Set a timer. Sometimes the mental energy of making time for a shower can be enough to make you avoid it. Setting a firm beginning and end time can help. This can make it feel more manageable.
Purchase a soft water filter head. This can purify the excess “hard” minerals from the water, leaving you with a more enjoyable showering experience. This can be especially helpful if you have eczema or sensitive skin.
Start with realistic goals. If showering is something you want to do more frequently, set a realistic goal for the week. It can also help to build designated shower days into your routine.
Make your shower experience more enjoyable. One way to help you stick to those goals is to make showering more rewarding. You can do this in a number of small ways. Find a body wash smell that you love, listen to music while you’re in the shower, or reward yourself with a warm cup of tea afterwards.
The bottom line
Many people look forward to their shower every day. But this isn’t true for everyone. Your showering routine should take into account your preferences, needs, comfort, and personal well-being. If you hate showering, there are many ways to make it more enjoyable. Find a few ways to shake up your routine to make it easier for you.
Why trust our experts?
References
American Academy of Dermatology Association. (2024). Hives: How to get relief at home.
Britannica. (n.d.). Ritual bath.
HomeWater. (2022). Hard water vs. soft water: What's the difference and does it matter?
Jason’s Water Systems. (2024). How hard water impacts showers.
McGrath, P. (2024). What is harm OCD? Signs, symptoms, and treatment. NOCD.
Murphy, N. (2022). What is ablutophobia? CPD Online College.
Murphy, N. (2023). What is aquaphobia? CPD Online College.
National Eczema Association. (n.d.). Eczema and bathing.
Smith, I. (2023). Hygiene indifference: The symptom we don’t talk about. National Alliance on Mental Illness.
World Population Review. (n.d.). Bathing habits by country 2024.
For additional resources or to connect with mental health services in your area, call SAMHSA’s National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357. For immediate assistance, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988, or text HOME to 741-741 to reach the Crisis Text Line.
