Wondering How to Keep Your New Year’s Resolutions? We Asked a Psychologist for Advice
Key takeaways:
Many people use the new year as motivation to make changes in their life. But very few people are able to maintain their New Year’s resolutions throughout the year.
There are common pitfalls that make it harder to stick to resolutions. These include all-or-nothing thinking, taking on too lofty a goal, or running into internal or external resistance to change.
To keep your New Year’s resolution this year, consider setting approach-oriented goals rather than those focused on specific results or avoidance. Including some reflection and planning techniques beforehand can also set you up for success.
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Are you starting the year off with a New Year’s resolution? January 1st marks a milestone — a fresh start and new beginnings. Close to half of all adults set New Year’s resolutions. Unfortunately, an estimated eight in ten people drop these resolutions by February. Often, people have unrealistic expectations about how fast change can happen. Or they underestimate how hard a goal might be to maintain.
In this article, we interviewed Dr. Colleen M. Fairbanks, a licensed clinical psychologist specializing in health and wellness. She shared her top tips for setting — and actually keeping — your resolutions this year.
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Common pitfalls of new year’s resolutions
Before diving into how to keep your New Year’s resolutions this year, it’s helpful to first review some common mistakes people make when setting them in the first place.
All-or-nothing thinking
Keeping a New Year’s resolution doesn’t mean you need to meet them 100% of the time. As Dr. Fairbanks shared, “Change happens when we consistently show up for ourselves. Consistency doesn’t mean perfection.”
Often, when people miss their goals for a few days, they abandon the resolution entirely. Instead, remember that it’s normal to have a day or week where you fall short. Be kind to yourself and look at it as an expected bump in the road rather than a failure. Adjust your plan as needed. There’s a middle ground — you can try again tomorrow or next week.
Taking on too much
Often, we envision big changes in health and wellness. This is especially true when it comes to goals related to weight loss. But big changes are easier to achieve when you make small changes over time.
Small tweaks are easier to incorporate into your daily routine, said Dr. Fairbanks. This will make it easier to be consistent so that the change becomes a habit. Over time, these small adjustments will lead to long-lasting change that feels seamless, rather than a stressful task.
For example, if you’ve never exercised but want to start running, signing up for a road race might be taking on too much. Instead, begin with a short walk a few days a week to build the habit.
High-impact health habits: Not sure where to start? Here’s a list of small daily habits that have a big impact on your health.
Is weight loss your New Year’s resolution? This doesn’t have to mean cutting calories or following a restrictive diet. Here are ways to find a comfortable weight without dieting or medication.
Staying motivated: Our experts explain the psychology of motivation. And they provide tips to help you stick to your health goals.
Resisting change is easier
Humans are creatures of habit. It’s easier to stick to similar foods throughout the week or head straight home after work instead of going to the gym. New habits can be hard to form and maintain. So, it’s important to recognize any internal dialogue that might talk you out of making a change.
“Resistance can come in the form of our mind telling us it won’t matter if we do it. Or that we don’t have time or the energy to do it,” Dr. Fairbanks explained. Resistance can also come from other people, who may unknowingly be a source of sabotage. For example, your spouse may prefer you come home earlier in the evening rather than take the time to go to the gym.
6 tips for keeping New Year’s resolutions
While these resolution-sabotaging mistakes are common, there are plenty of ways to set yourself up for success. Here are 6 psychologist-approved tips.
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1. Focus on your wants
When setting your New Year’s resolution, focus on what you want for yourself — not what you think you should want or what others want for you. “Drop the shoulds and focus on the wants,” said Dr. Fairbanks.
When you focus on your wants, you’re more likely to spend time mentally preparing for the change. And people who have a readiness for change before starting a resolution have a higher likelihood of keeping it. Lasting changes in health and wellness are more likely to stick when you want them and have been thinking about your plans — and the barriers that may arise.
2. Challenge your current beliefs
Before making changes, spend some time reflecting on your current thoughts or beliefs that are an obstacle to change. For example, if you think that your health is based only on your genetics, you may not believe your behavior matters.
People who believe that their actions in life have an impact on their own outcomes tend to stick to their resolutions. Remind yourself that the changes you make today can make a difference in your health tomorrow.
3. Set approach-based goals
Setting health-related goals can be challenging because many factors are out of your control. When setting your goals, make them about the approach, not the result. For example, if you want to lower your cholesterol, set a goal to eat three servings of fruits or vegetables per day. Or aim to go to the gym 2 days per week. These goals are more productive than setting a goal for a specific cholesterol test result.
People who set approach-based goals also tend to be more successful than those who set avoidance-based goals. An example of an avoidance goal might be, “I’m not going to eat any cookies for 3 months.”
4. Get support
Personal relationships and social situations have a big impact on health and wellness. Friends, coworkers, spouses, siblings, and parents can either be a source of support — or sabotage. Sometimes, when others haven’t addressed their own health challenges, they can unintentionally be a source of stress.
Talk to your close friends and family about your wellness goals, and let them know what type of support would help you achieve your goals. Find an accountability partner with similar goals who can support you by checking in.
5. It’s all about small changes
Behavioral experts agree that small changes are easier to keep and can build confidence to help you stick to your goals over a longer period of time. According to BJ Fogg, PhD, author of Tiny Habits, “If you are trying to do 200 push-ups, start with one.” The same goes for goals related to food, health, and wellness. Starting with small, achievable changes will help you build your confidence.
6. Healthy rewards and celebration
Setting, maintaining, and achieving goals deserves celebration! Think of a few rewards that can help motivate you along the way. When you treat yourself to positive reinforcement, it will encourage continued progress. Maybe it’s as simple as a new shirt for the gym. You decide what will motivate you and what fits within your budget.
If you need help thinking of a new year’s resolution
If you aren’t quite sure where to start with setting a New Year’s resolution, Dr. Fairbanks has some helpful advice. She recommends the following formula to her clients:
Before the end of the year, find a quiet space where you can take some time to reflect. Close your eyes.
Take inventory of your body and health in its current state. In what ways do you feel healthy and strong? Are there any aspects of your health that are a source of stress or worry?
If you could change one thing to move you closer to achieving your ideal health, what would it be?
Now break that goal down into smaller, manageable steps. What change can you start with that feels easy to incorporate into your daily life? What are you most looking forward to trying first? How can you build on that goal over time?
Remember, your goals don’t need to be big or complicated. If you know you want to improve your health but aren’t sure how, here are some examples of places to start:
Go for a walk
Make connection with people a priority
Practice mindfulness
Eat more fresh foods
Get outside
Prioritize sleep
Sip on plain water
Many people are skeptical about whether New Year’s resolutions really work. But Dr. Fairbanks noted that the end of the year is a good time to reflect and make a change. “It’s a great time to set new intentions and goals,” she added.
The bottom line
The new year can bring a fresh outlook on the year ahead. It can be a great time to set a new goal that holds meaning for you. To help you keep your New Year’s resolution this year, avoid all-or-nothing thinking and taking on overly ambitious goals. Take time to reflect on a manageable plan that will get you there. And prepare for any obstacles you might meet along the way. Most importantly, remember to be kind to yourself. There will always be setbacks and things outside your control. Take time to reward yourself for your progress, big and small!
Why trust our experts?
References
Allen, L. (2024). New Year’s resolutions statistics and trends. Drive Research.
Cobb-Clark, D. A., et al. (2014). Healthy habits: The connection between diet, exercise, and locus of control. Journal of Economic Behavior and Organization.
Gracia, S. (2024). New Year’s resolutions: Who makes them and why. Pew Research Center.
Oscarsson, M., et al. (2020). A large-scale experiment on New Year’s resolutions: Approach-oriented goals are more successful than avoidance-oriented goals. PLOS One.
For additional resources or to connect with mental health services in your area, call SAMHSA’s National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357. For immediate assistance, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988, or text HOME to 741-741 to reach the Crisis Text Line.
